BlogXilla For Sexual Intellectuals - Latest Comments in Love No Longer Exist

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Tron — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 22:54:19 -0000

I believe in "love", but not being "in love with someone." Love does exist but not the type of love that people want in relationships. I love alot of things and alot of people: My mother, my son, myself, my car, my music, etc. To me, that's true love. As far as relationships go, I think that people fall in love with what a person does for them rather who the person is.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Jazzie_B15 — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 20:19:23 -0000

Love do still exist in the black community! As a race of people we just don't know how to communicate with one another with our feelings. Love is a very strong word that is used so freely that we don't think about the pain it could cause to another person in the long run. Love is patients and unfortunate we don't learn that until we get older or many lost lovers later. Some of our parents wasn't taught that and some of the were. Some that were just lost it allow the way when they were hurt by the ones that wasn't taught the meaning of love. My first love was my bestfriend and it hurts to know that I will never love like that again because he is gone but the love, pain, and fond memories are still within.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

lethaschild — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 19:00:27 -0000

Actually Meat Eater I agree with you somewhat. If you truly loved that person, when you break up and go your seperate ways, it should just be that. Sometimes people forget though that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. People think that the only way to get over someone is to be mean to that person or say they can't stand them. They mistakenly believe that this will give them the "thing" they need to move on. If you just remember that you love that person even though you're no longer in love, then you can move on. Hating them just shows that you are still emotionally tied to them. If you wanna prove you're over them, leave it alone.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

lethaschild — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 18:54:43 -0000

As I hear your longing, I feel your pain. Loveis kind of like that. The more you want it, the further away it seems to be. But I can tell you from personal experience that when I finally found real love, it was when I stopped looking for it. Keep your eyes closed, keep learning her. Don't expect her to be perfect, just perfect for you. Once you do that and open your eyes, she'll be standing right in front of you.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Fri, 10 Oct 2008 16:45:27 -0000

Honestly, I would love to be in love. It does exist, and one day when someone is willing to give me, everything that I want to give them, it will work out. There is nothing I don't want more, than to have a man to take care of, and have him care for me in return. It'll be hard to find but there are still good and genuine loving people in the world.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Reesethe — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 14:16:22 -0000

Preach on girl!!!

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Reesethe — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 14:12:16 -0000

I believe that love does exist but people have a tendency to define love through material value. People nowadays are afraid to love because of the misconceptions that have be given in society. I think there is someone out there for evryone if you "look" hard enough. But a person has to be cautious because there are people out here that will take advantage. When you let that wall down and let love in it can be the most inspiring thing in the world. You just have to make sure you are not wasting it on the wrong person. Even if you have been hurt by someone that doesn't give you a reason to lock away your heart and your feelings for the rest of your life. If you do that can you honestly imagine meeting new people for the next couple decades and not having one bit of foundation or feelings for any of them? Thats sad.

I just think that in the african american community it is harder to find someone of quality because of the images that are put out there from today's mainstream and hip hop media. This genre is so caught up in nice clothes, nice cars and fat asses so now most men and women do not take the time to get to know each other like our previous generations. Hopefully we can get back on track. True love is out there but you have to weed out the foolishness to get to it.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

kingsmomma — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 14:08:32 -0000

Or that person just hurt you so badly

Re: Love No Longer Exist

kingsmomma — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 14:07:21 -0000

I think that is denial. You never stop loving them. You go on living like you're incomplete. People who say they can't stand the person really mean thet can't stand that they aren't in thier lives anymore. Love just doesn't go away like that.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

V.I. — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 13:46:12 -0000

I can never understand when people who say their in love and then when their over they can't stand the person. If that is the case then in my opinion you were never in love. I have been in love 2x in my life, and even though they may have been bad break-ups I still love them, but not in love with them. I can never hate or despise them. We tried something that never worked, cool. I am glad that they made way for the right man to come into my life, even though it hurt when both relationships ended I wouldn't change a thing. I learned alot.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

ChucksFavorite — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 13:29:43 -0000

I have indeed been in love before, and it was a beautiful thing. It was also very painful. People say that love isn't supposed to hurt, but I beg to differ. Love is beautiful because when you're in love,all that's wrong in the world doesn't matter when you're with that person. Love is beatiful because you don't see their flaws, you see what makes them perfect, in your eyes. When in love, the most mundane activities become so much more fun with that person. But, love hurts too. It hurts when you find out your better half has been unfaithful. It hurts when you find out that your lover hasn't been honest with you. it hurts when you realize that that person doesn't love you the same.

In life, nothing is going to be good all the time. If it were, we would have nothing to look forward to to. I believe whole heartedly in love, and I KNOW that one day it will find me. Who knows...it may have already found me and I just don't know it.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

tiki — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 12:55:43 -0000

thats a good way to look at it and i totally agree.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

kyas_mami — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 12:41:08 -0000

At one point I had given up on love, but then I took the time to re-evaluate my idea/criteria of what LOVE is.. to me
Once I did that I realized i had some work to do on myself..
I thinks it's just a matter of finding someone who wants the same things we do.. whether that is a bust it baby, friend with benefits or a monogomous relationship. The hard part is not bending or compromising what you really want and settling for Mr. or Mrs. Right Now.
It also helps to stop LOOKING for love...it will find you, usually when you least expect it. The hardest part is recognizing it.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

tiki — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 12:40:26 -0000

i believe in soulmates. I believe with some people there is just a connection. something so strong, so natural, almost like an energy that connects the two. You don't have that with everybody you come across.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

ThatchickNik — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 12:36:30 -0000

Excellent piece Xilla!

Re: Love No Longer Exist

kingsmomma — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 12:29:49 -0000

I absolutely believe Love still exists. I've had it and i'm too young to think It will never come again. I will find the yang to my ying but i believe it is just very hard work. Our grandparents had love, the real ups and downs but i'd rather have hard times with you kind of love. Love is when you both are laying in bed on a saturday morning and your partner lets out the fart that rivals the perm activator and you don't get up and run, but throw on back and laugh about it. Love is understanfing your spouse is having a hard time taking a shit because her pregnancy makes her constipated and you sit in the bathroom and coach her on. We tend to get so overworked with the romanticizes images of love, what they writers and directors think love should be and if we continue to live our lives by that standard we will never find our true love.
Love hurts, you feel it in your heart, in your head, the palms of your hand and teh flutters in your belly. When you are having those daydreams about the times you spent together, when you leave them and you can't stop smiling. I think people need to stop looking at it in terms of what have you done for me lately and then you'll allow yourself to fall. Maybe you will get your heartbroken but do you know true happiness and joy if you have never felt pain?

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Starr — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 12:22:27 -0000

I believe in love. No matter how many times I've been hurt or how many men have caused me heartache, I still believe that there is someone out there for me. I have to stay in the mindframe that "There's always something better". I've learned not to expect the worst but to hope for the best and enjoy the ride. I ran across a quote that says in order to win, you have to risk loss. Take chances. As hard as it is and easier said than done, let go of past hard feelings. Holding on to pain and unforgiving thoughts only hinders incoming blessings. You may miss out on a good thing by giving off that air of distrust. I want to be in love someday. I want the husband and the kids. I want the marriage and the house, the whole she-bang! Just patiently waiting

Re: Love No Longer Exist

tiki — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 12:13:02 -0000

xilla i love this blog. I guess i am a hopeless romantic because i refuse to give up on LOVE. I can say that i have truly been in love once and although it was the best thing that happend to me, it was also the worst. Never felt a pain like it before. A physically pain (have to have been there to understand that). But yes i do believe that LOVE exist. It's something that i feel is so natural, something you don't have to work at, it's just.........LOVE.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

V.I. — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 11:49:46 -0000

I believe in the power of words. I feel when you believe something is going to happen it probably will. I am not sure what your situation is, or why you "know" that you will never find love but I believe if you continuosly say it it's gonna happen. Now I have not had luck in my life involving love, and there was a time where I felt I would never know what true love is and having a family. I had to shake that out of my mind, because I was already defining what would happen to me, when I know that wasn't what I wanted. I haven't found "the one" yet but I honestly feel he is out there. I have choosen not to look for him because love should just find you not you looking for it, because when you look for it you get everything you never wanted. That is just my take on it.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Ness — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 11:43:11 -0000

I do. I believe in soul mates. But I also believe that there's an opposite sex twin out there for every person. I found my guy twin. And I found my soul mate & they're two diff people.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Marvelous Mo — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 11:32:35 -0000

I'm not an A.B.W., nor am I a scorned soul, but I don't believe in true love...not in my life. I always give props and support my friends and fam when they found their true love, but I already know I won't find mine. You can't say I'm young and jumping to conclusions. Biggie knew he wasn't going to make it at 30 yrs old, thats why he was ready to die. I know I won't find it. I have accepted the fact that marriage and children aren't in the plans of my life. But like I said, I always support and love the people around me who found that. It's a beautiful site to see two people who are in love. It really is.

Awesome blog post, sir.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

V.I. — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 11:05:29 -0000

Does anyone believe in soulmates?

Re: Love No Longer Exist

chanel — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 10:32:47 -0000

Love is an interesting thing.. and sometimes you don't even know you have it until you have already lost it.

Re: Love No Longer Exist

Kee — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 10:10:55 -0000

LOVE CAN BE BEAUTIFUL

Re: Love No Longer Exist

SarahLove — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 09:13:07 -0000

True love doesn’t exist…. because True Love has no opposite. If one day you can say you love someone, and the next attack, blame, put down, and rage against the other person, then what really exist is dependency, control, and neediness. True love has no conditions. It exists whether you are in a relationship with that person or not. It exists if you both decide that you are not meant to be together. It exists if that other person decides to leave you to be with someone that they gel with better. Love is not reserved for some person whom your intimate with, love is given to the bus driver, to the cab driver, to the person at the check out to the person next door. True love is what you feel for the Universe, not just someone you have sex with. True love loves the son that comes home and says he’s gay…. the daughter that comes home and says she no longer is a Christian. True love loves, no matter what. True love is inspirational. It makes you want to be everything that you have the power to be. True love wants happiness for you no matter what.