BlogXilla For Sexual Intellectuals - Latest Comments in How To Talk To Red Bones

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

TK4life — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 01:53:59 -0000

...this is pure sh!t. Just learn to treat all women with respect. You can't act like their sh!t don't stink too. Regardless of her color, just make sure you get a girl that's not brain dead.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

I'mSoMe — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 04:54:58 -0000

I agree with everything you said Kiwi, but I don't think he meant it that way. He was merely stating that this is an issue within the media and everyday life, because it is. However, the issue is not within other races, its within "us" ourselves. And by "us" I mean the Black Community. But I ask Xilla and other fans of this topic...Is it that the media is not recognizing dark skinned women as equal...or is it that "WE" are not recognizing them that way? And again...by "we" I mean the Black Community. Ever hear the phrases "I am my worst critic" or "If I laugh at myself first, it won't seem so bad"? Why criticize our women so harshly when everyone else sees them the same? Why are we trying to beat them to the punch? "WE" look so f***ing stupid because "EVERYONE ELSE" always gets the last laugh. This shit is so old and nonrelevant (yet so relevant) that sometimes I wonder.....

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

I'mSoMe — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 04:32:52 -0000

No disrespect Blogxilla, but if you wanted us to comment on the "source site" then why post it on yours? Second, I don't think darkskinned women are treated differently than lightskinned, its just in how they look at themselves. I've heard it a million times before...the lightskinned girls will fight tooth and nail to land a role in a video or film while the chocolates don't think its always worth the fight. How far you get ahead is all in the woman herself! They generally allow the media and dumbass men (light and dark) to intimidate them with this light and dark shit! This is why black people, light, medium or dark (for those who have forgotten how many shades we come in) will never advance beyond our white counterparts. The truth of the matter is...black men (and women alike), have our people separated down to a color code. Take a look at the media and real life...the white boys aren't separating the browns from the blues, or the blondes from the brunettes. Things they could look for in a woman, but they remember one thing...THEY'RE ALL WHITE!!! You do the math!!

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

LiteBrite — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 02:21:37 -0000

@kyas_mami ..as a light skinned female with light eyes i completely understand...and it frustrates me that when colorism is discussed..that particular side of the story is never told..Sure there are red bones that think they are the shit for just being bright..but not all of us are like that. Just like there are stuck up dark skinned girls..I hate that i meet alot of dark skinned females who seem to blame me or any other light skinned gurl for the light over dark mentality when we neither came up with this nor do most of us agree or perpetuate this foolishness. Its just another way to conquer and divide the african-american people and sadly its a pretty successful tactic
Moral of the story there are pretty red bones and dark skinned girls as well as ugly light and dark skinned girls..and oh yea BLOGXILLA i love ur blog but i feel like this only perpetuated the stereotype of stuck up light skinned girls when in reality a lot of females fall into those categories regardless of skin tone

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

yes — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 02:14:21 -0000

this is absurd

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

Ms. Smith — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 23:45:26 -0000

Wow just wow! Objectifying women on any level sucks! But since we are going there, I have decided to no longer date chocolate brothers. That's right, I am going cold turkey. It is taking some effort but I have decided that chocholate brothers have been in too long and it is affecting there attitude. I am officially only dating light skinned brothers! My theory is that they no they are not in so they will treat you better. I am giving this test 3 months and will report back on the outcome.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

coco — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 17:22:42 -0000

Well, I have now heard it all...Xilla these comments you quoting are pure ignorance. I aint offended, cuz I guess thats how it is. Im glad you can appreciate all women!

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

ANuJS — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:54:10 -0000

Agreed, but about that "taste better" shit from above..SMH

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

ANuJS — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:53:16 -0000

I agree. Light skinned women couldn't have possibly sat around and decided they were the shit. I think it just stems from slavery and we refuse to let go of this mentality. I personally think that SOME blacks have a lot of slave mentality. (As a teacher, you just wouldn't believe the way some folks can act....SMH) However, I have always been mystified by the men who are so shallow to JUST see light vs. dark. I have seen some U-G-L-Y girls being chased b/c of how "fine" they were and the only thing fine about them was their hair type and skin color. It's true that beauty will attract, but it takes more than this to keep them. I think that it all just boils down to thinking "YOU" are the shit and everyone else can only think the same way about you. I struggled for years and it took my best friend (who wouldn't be considered a beauty in most peoples mind) to show me that it comes from within. I personally can't hate a women for being pretty or light skinned. It is amazing to me that society can only accept one idea of beauty. Perfect example is Kelly Rowland not as pretty as Beyonce? In order for me to be pretty do I have to be thin, light skinned, and have hair to my waist? This depresses me b/c there are a lot of fat, dark skinned little girls with short nappy hair that will forever struggle with whether or not they are pretty. This is what upsets me.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

mia — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:54:36 -0000

I can understand where dark skin women are coming from. I'm mahogany brown, and when I was younger, like jr high years, the boys all chased the light skin and hispanic girls, mostly the hispanic girls. I was self concsious cause I didn't think my skin was pretty. Even though all my life I've heard, "you're so pretty to be dark skinned" (I truly despise that phrase. I'm still like WTF everytime I hear it), I didn't really think so, but as I grew older especially my last years of HS, I grew into my own. I began to appreciate my mahogany complexion and my body (try being the only 8th grader with ass & dds). I think it might've helped if the videos we saw had chicks that looked like me. Even in dance class that they always put the lighter chicks in the front row. I think black women in general are a hot commodity. I mean yeah we bicker amongst each other, but who do most other women try to immulate??? I think that once we get over our own fears and prejudice toward on another, then we can work on others. Besides as far as I'm concerened everyone is intitled to have a preference. Like me, I thought that I was genrally open to most men, but when I evaluated I noticed I like big tall men, kind of like a line backer, and I like them dark and handsome. To each, its own.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

SugarTits — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:13:21 -0000

LMAO...we taste better X? lol..Gotta luv it.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

Aura — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:01:59 -0000

People are taking this blog way too seriously. It was meant to be funny.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

Ness — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 13:52:09 -0000

I'm a red bone and I'm the most easy going light skinned girl EVER. When guys try to spark up a convo, I don't shun them. I talk to them and sometimes it gets confused w/ flirting. But I'm still polite ;)
However, I wouldn't say light skinned women need to be treated differently when approaching them. An attitude is an attitude whether, black, white or asian etc.

Being a red bone, I think brown skin women are BEAUTIFUL. Their skin is so smooth and their just gorgeous! (no homo...lol) But I think they're under rated and I'm not sure why.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

BlogXilla — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 13:31:45 -0000

ARE YALL GOING OVER TO THE OTHER BLOG AND READING THE WHOLE THING?
1 THESE ARE THINGS I actually heard people say, it's outlandish!! and if you read all the way to the bottom you see i say

I moved my seat once the conversation stalled.

After all these opinions I'm still not sure what the fascination is with red bones. All I know is that they are in every video, all the fashion shows and if there is a dark skinned beauty in the area the light skinned women outnumber them 3 to 1. I can't help but wonder if we live in a world full of Yung Bergs.

The fact that you have to look hard for a dark skinned girl who is not the usual 3 is ridiculous that's what this blog is about... lol I guess you all are proving my point.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

Kiwi — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 12:41:45 -0000

Xilla I read your blog everyday...i know you mean well sweetie but this was plain ignorant! I know there is this light skin girl "sterotype" the fair skin girls are stuck up...but all of your points you can use that amongst any type of female red bone(I hate that term by the way), drk skin, white, asian, latina...so why dont you put tips on how to approach a dark skin woman...are u saying they arent as complicated? Are you nutz?

I am a light skin woman, and I hate the fact that me being this color is always a sterotype...We are stuck up, we thing we are better, we think we are more privelege, BS!!! That can go for any female and its the female who has the attitude not because of her color...and maybe you got your feelings hurt way too many times Xilla but you need not to typecast light skin woman because society already typecast out race so please dont divide it anymore...I am going on and on but I just want to let you know that your blog today was truely offensive as a loyal reader of your and you should think before your type something like this. It was wrong and a women's color has nothing to do with how you approach her...all that is important is that you RESPECT HER!

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

NaijaWifey — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 12:33:28 -0000

XILLA,

YOU AND THIS FOOLERY ON THIS BLOG IS KILLING ME DAY IN AND DAY OUT! i AM A DARK SKINNED WOMEN AND MY 2 FRIENDS ARE LIGHT AND I AM THE ONE WHO GETS THE GUY EVERYTIME. I TRULY BELIEVE THIS IS MORE FOOLISHNESS...

SO NOW LET ME WARN ALL OF YOU DARK SKINNED, THICK SINGLE MOMMAS...PLEASE DONT JUMP, BACK AWAY FROM THE LEDGE AND PLEASE DONT PAY THIS FOOLISHNESS NO ATTENTION. THERE IS LOVE OUT THERE FOR YOU,YOU JUST HAVE TO LOVE YOURSELF FIRST!

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

LuvChild — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 12:09:03 -0000

I digress I cannot even indulge in such a topic that should be non-existent.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

LuvChild — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 12:09:01 -0000

I digress I cannot even indulge in such a topic that should be non-existent.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

kyas_mami — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 12:05:03 -0000

I can get wit u on this one Xilla...
Evn tho I AM a true red bone (light skin, freckles, red hair) I too get frustrated about the lack of equal representation in the media of ALL Black women, Light, Dark and in between...

but another thing that frustrates me, and I think alot of othe light skinned women may feel the same, is that WE (light skinned women) at least in the Black Community, seem to get all the blame for this... Like we all sat together, had a round table discussion and decided that this was how it should be, that we were better or more beautiful than our darker counterparts. The same way dark skinned women dont get love in the media, light skinned women dont get love from our darker sistas... I can't even begin to count the dirty looks, the snide comments, etc etc i get on a daily basis just cus I had the "Audacity" to be born with light skin, freckles, and long red hair!! And lets not even talk about high school! Sometimes I just feel like screaming I had nothing to do with my genetics!!!!!! And I dont carry, nor do I think of myself as "Superior" to darker women.

UGH!!! This whole subject is so very frustrating because, it's almost like we as african american women perpetuate the sterotype by hating on each other!! I dont think light skin is more beautiful than dark skin, I think it's a shame there's not equal representation but shit, it's the world we live in... u can either eat up the bullshit and let it form the way you think or you can be happy just being you. We as women have it hard enough without factoring in color...

U did it again Xilla... i'll mos def be checkin back in all day to read these comments... cus u kno it's bout to get POPPIN in here LOL!

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

BlogXilla — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:42:14 -0000

and that is why this conversation is needed. It's a problem and people don't want to talk about it. This debate isn't that light skinned women are better the debate is that darker women need equal love.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

Killa — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:38:32 -0000

Most definitly, I moved to Atlanta from Cali where being light isnt a big deal, shoot everyone is damn near light skin, and to be honest I think it's simple and quite pathetic the way some brothers drool over a woman just because she's light, I think it's ridiculous.

In man world what is the fascination, what is the big deal with shade, shouldn't it be about her character? Are thier dark skin mamas not beautiful to them? I'm just sayin?

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

BlogXilla — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:25:58 -0000

Maybe you're not different but with all the attention light skin women get they tend to act a bit different. Maybe not you, but the majority of light skinned women. Just like people in NJ act a different way than people in atlanta, and people in cali think this way ans people in alaska think another way. When people treat you a certain way, you tend to come out differently. Its just life according to me. I'm glad you're not different though. thats probably why i like you.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

BlogXilla — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:21:41 -0000

I see your point but it's not just the TV it's in real life too. These southern men love white women and light skinned girls I see it all the time. They drool over light skinned whether she is cute or not just as long as she's light skinned. You got a bunch of dark skinned girls who are beautiful trying to lighten their skinn and putting on blonde hair it's crazy it exist in tv and real life.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

Killa — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:21:02 -0000

How are we a different breed?? We're all women dark or light.

Re: How To Talk To Red Bones

Killa — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:17:43 -0000

Smooches.

I understand the meida doesn't balance the scale, but all I'm saying is why do we let the media define us? WE buy into the dark skin light skin bull, it's up to us to stop digesting whats on the plate just because it's put in front of us...you see my point?