some woman are twisted like that! I ain't got no baby daddy. I have never disliked a man, talked shit about a man and then slept with him. If you want to talk shit about him and say his shit ain't good, then STOP PHUCKING HIM!!!! it annoys me as well... it is why women like me with no baby daddy, don't like dating men who have children. we always thinking he's sleeping with his BM no matter if she likes him today or not!
Thoney Gangstasweet
· 1 year ago
AMEN! so i just blogged about this... peep the tomfuckery i just went thru! ARG!
on one recent RARE occassion this male. we'll call him Blucralpha stepped to me. He had it goin on,intelligent, great dresser,taller than me, kinda chubby, great job in an office building near mines, nice car, went to church sorta often and loved him some Hani. he couldn't make me cum by fucking, but his head was something like oscarworthy dramatic and he spoke the entire time. HEY THERE NOW! tell her how good it is...meeemories...ANYwho. our freakometers were eerily in tune! in the bathroom at the taste with the frozen chocolate bananas? ok i have on a sundress and thigh-highs. its NOTHING! i'll have Rob buzz you up for the apetizer....moving along, Blucralpha and I dated for a hot minute. Never did I know of the tomfuggery that would beseech my sweet soul...BLAM! his babymama leaps out the Pjs like a rat round ol' jewtown.Did Blublu reallyhave a 10month old son by a hoodrat that decided to stalk me? nah. this will all go away after i finish this bottle of Soracco[fellas cop that wine] so I meet the trollop on the wesside, on my turf in case i gotta phone the goons to get her right. [Don't get it twisted, i've been known to beat the breaks off hoes while donning brooks brothers and prada. ASK about the kid....side bar ,the CPD should utilize babymama's supersleuthin skills and find Alexi's ass cuz blublu's trollp shole NUFF found me! i STAY lowkey wtfugg? AAAANYwho] after speaking with her and being urged to just stay away from her babydaddy, I was left dumbfounded and completely confused. I cried for days. Not because I thought Blucralpha was my futurebabydaddy, but more for the sorry state we're in as young blacks trying to love/date. How did he find her block to hump her? Judging by her appearance she definitely was a potential slamonella or hiv carrier, so why would he go raw?he went in it for some quick easy lowkey no work booty and is now saddled down with a40-life sentence. [when u have a kid ur attached to that person for ur entire life span. i figure u live to about 80 so u and the trollop gone have ta at least be social for 40 or so years past the humpin pt] Have we lost out minds?!!? ARG!?! needless to say, I never spoke to him again and to this day he shoots me the side eye or tries to randomly call. I love me so damn much I'm not interested in any explanation. thas why i'm unhappily single i guess. i don't do conflict well at all. i'm evil and cut people off quicka thanna skrippa lose clothes... i hope you went to blogxilla's site. he has some REALLY dope posts on there. REALLY! everything i'm reading is making me rethink my whole situation...mmhmm! sho nuff!
i, and many like melooking for what u mentioned above but he is settling for whoever sparkles the most or is easy. i know 3 brothas right now, probably paying for everything their chick wants only to not get a thank u/be fighting tonite. all this because she's light/gotta phatass. mmm? yes! my guy told me "my girl nuttier thant sherise[this crazy chick from hf] but i mean i like when niggas look at me like i gotta bad one. its not that u like ain worf dating,u ain ugly and u cool as hell, but a nigga see you and think that's somebody's mama material, and u prolly gotta man.i wanted to snap my phone in half but i totally got what he was sayin. it was real. i have a huge heart and am more maternal and love to look out for those i love, so that makes me undatable to black men in chicago? wowzers! it irks me to my core how men have soooo many options and i'm stuck internet dating and or dealing with somebody's husband. i'm worth more than that. and have more respect for somebody else's union than that. i mean a brotha can have the white freak,the asian assistant to do the work, the indian to run the money, the latina for hot sex,all while bn married to a sista. FUCK THAT!
anywho my adventure with Blucalpha the babydaddy broke my heart. not because i loved him but because i felt so damn powerless. i've even been trapped by a guy in the[the damn STEELerho wasn't even working with a sphaghettithumb. at 320lbs i shouldn't need my contract readers on to see it] and i will openly admit i headed str8 to the chop shot to handle my bi. bc failed me....i REFUSE to have a baby by someone i don't care for! and i would have been set for life! mmmm these haffas and trollops out here popping babies out like the rats they are and struggling and fuckin for free. i don't understand it. i'm gonna keep my tight p-u nice and spawn free. even if i do have a baby i'm getting a c-sections and tummytuck cuz my goodies need to stay right! yaDIIIIIIG!? its time for this bs to END! NOW! i ain' playin! i swear i'm not! while these losers are humping the bowl movements l mean baby mamas[i got confused] they are passing up winners like myself! WEAR A DAMN CONDOM or pull out! seriously!
Highly Favored
· 1 year ago
This just kills me when people do this. They dog their B.M. or B.D. out every chance they get, but will go out their way to get some ass. Maybe its the familiarity that they are comfortable with. I think in the long run its just turns into nothing but a bunch of drama. Its also not any benefit to the kid/s. And the child is just used as a pun between them.
Queen Of Buzz
· 1 year ago
OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH! I am seriously hoping this is a joke and I'm overreacting because I don't have a sense of humor at this exact moment.
If the man knows the woman is crazy why can't he take the 10 seconds to tear open the condom and put it on. If the woman knows that the man already has three kids that he doesn't take care of, why not take the time everyday to swallow a pill. All of this nonsense does not have to happen.
Hell i had to keep fukin my B.M so she wouldn't take a nigga to court to try to take some of my illegally obtained gwap. i felt like a whore - Seems to me you are the cause of the chaos. Let her take you to court and let her have your money if it will give you peace of mind. Fucking to get out of child support? Really?
anyway we would do the nasty from time to time in-between the temporary restraining orders, and court dates, niggas lookin for me cuz i done slapped soul sista with a back hand reminiscing of the good ol' IKE TURNER. - This is why I feel sorry for your son.
Women aren't with their baby daddy's because they lay down with any old piece of dick and end up pregnant...and then look stupid when he doesn't pay child support....
What really pisses me off about this tragedy of a blog is that the kids are the ones that suffer the most and then we have little boys who are like their trifling daddy's, little girls that turn out like their mothers. Neither have any respect for life or themselves.
Your answer is simple. It is pure ignorance and selfishness.
P Lee
· 1 year ago
DONT FEEL SORRY FOR NO ONE. SOUNDS LIKE YOU DONE GOT THE 4 WALL TREATMENT ( YOU KNOW SLAPPEM SO HARD THEY SPIN AND HIT EVERY WALL IN THE ROOM). AND I AM TELLING A FIB WITH THE IKE TURNER STORY IT ADDED A LIL COLOR TO A DULL TOPIC. NEXT TIME SWEETS "BOB AND WEAVE". DONT BE MAD AT ME CUZ I TAPPED A NERVE
Queen Of Buzz
· 1 year ago
You certainly did tap a nerve, because it's bullshit. You aren't the only one "struggling" with this issue, and that is another problem. No one in this type of situation is giving a damn about the children. The children that are out on the street late at night because Mommy and Daddy are out kicking it. Mommy bashing the Dad because he's not around, so little boys grow up thinking men aren't shit, little girls grow up thinking men aren't shit, and giving up the pussy is the key to life. The children who don't have people to help them with their homework or teach them about respect for others and for themselves. Children are impressionable and they emulate their households and their parents. What happened to parents wanting a better life for the kids....This is why kids are looking up to "superstars" as idols. Their idols should be tucking them in bed at night, and reading them a story. Not bullshitting around ruining their lives.
I mean I could say I don't give a shit about what happens in other peoples homes, but I do, because it affects me and my family. Men don't deserve extra points for being a good father, and women don't deserve extra points for being a good mother. You should do things that will help your child have a nice childhood, and be a responsible adult. It is our responsibility as parents.
Daddies Little Girl
· 1 year ago
And here I was thinking I was the only one who felt this way! I wish I could give u kudos for your comment.
Brown Girl
· 1 year ago
I personally wouldn't piss on my one surviving Baby Daddy if he were on fire. I just have no respect for the man, so it makes it kinda hard for me to let him "beat that azz up".
In general though, I think a lot of women have sex with their kids' father(s)despite the lack of a "real relationship" just because it's safe and comfortable. Better to stick to the devil you know, rather than the one you don't. Especially when you have kids in your home.
P Lee
· 1 year ago
I KNEW THIS BLOG WOULD CAUSE SOME ISSUES WITH THE LADIES BUT HEY..( I OVE PROBLEMS). TO BE HONEST AS I AM MOST OF THE TIME IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH BEING SELFISH OR IGNORANT AT ALL. IT HAS TO DO WITH KIDS HAVING KIDS WHICH I AM. I HAD MY SON WHEN I WAS 17 AND SO WAS SHE. NOW MY SUFFERS WILL NEVER SUFFER FOR HIS FATHERS AND MOTHERS INDESCRETION. BUT I FEEL I TOUCHED A FEW NERVES WITH THIS ONE AND I LIKE THE REACTION I AM GETTING. SOME SKELETONS IN THE CLOSET HUH...LOL MORAL OF THIS REPLY IS "IF THIS BLOG DONT PERTAIN TO YOU.. THEN SHUT THE FUK UP AND KEEP IT MOVING)
SHOT OUT TO ALI YA DIG. I MISS MY HOMIE.
Cheddar B
· 1 year ago
WOW is the first thing that came to mind. You know what, although the way you said it is rather harsh, the fact of the matter is that it's true. Women (and men sometimes), unfortunately, somewhere between the doctor telling them that they are pregnant and the actual birth, they lose their sense of reality and get what I like to call BMS (Baby Momma Syndrome). They feel as though since they have a child by a male, that their isht has been branded by the USBDA (United States Baby Daddies Association). They use the baby and the power of the puss as bait, and you guys fall for it everytime...smh. I strongly dislike women that use their kids as lateral to get what they want. You're only hurting your kid in the long run you stupid broad. If he aint isht to begin with, what make you think that the baby is going to magically zap some sense into him? It doesnt always happen that way. And if you have to use your baby as a way to get things out of him, do you really think that he's the man for you?
Hell i had to keep fukin my B.M so she wouldn't take a nigga to court to try to take some of my illegally obtained gwap.
I hate it when men say that! No you didnt, you chose to. There is this precious thing called the legal system, and I know the black man is allergic to it, but it's there to prevent isht like that from happening hon. If you want to be a father but her mother says it's the baby and me or nothing, go legal on her ass. We do it to men all the time. You are going to have to be the one to break away IF thats really what you want to do. Men complain alot about this bullisht, but do absolutley nothing to try and rectify their situations. Hell, it almost seems as though men like the drama more than women do.
Women play the that hate card because they hate the fact that they can't have them without all the strings. They know that you wouldnt be making those late runs to her house if the baby was not there. they know you're just there for the kid and their cooch is a bonus.
I am so glad that I am free of BMS. It's too much hassel and stress personally. I could care less what my childs father does or who he does it with, as long as my daughter and I are treated with respect, we're A-ok.
Chamonda
· 1 year ago
Girl u done spoke the bottom line for all of us BM's. I ain't studdin my baby daddy. U know what, I found out alot about my bd when I got pregnant by him and I thank God for giving me unconditionally support and the support of my mother and family. I gave that sob 6 months to get his shit together and give my child what he owe her and when his time ran out, I put 2 feet at the court house and told the nigga I forgive him but I'm doing what I have to do. It didn't have anything to do with revenge. Just give me what u owe. When that nigga seen in my eyes that i was dead serious, he never once tried to fuck with me again, his ass was scared of me. Later on he got locked up and found out some real man was taking good care of his child. She done been to Disney 3 times already and she ain't but 9 years old, and boy he feel real stupid sitting up in that jail knowing that some body doing his job that he never did.
Thoney Gangstasweet
· 1 year ago
so you're proud of the fact that you gotta stand-in babydaddy while ur sperm donor's locked away? is it a good thing that the man you should be co-raising your daughter with is scared of you? i'm not trying to play u out. i'm just saying........
Queen of Buzz
· 1 year ago
There is this precious thing called the legal system, and I know the black man is allergic to it, but it's there to prevent isht like that from happening hon.
Amen! Especially since they will put the woman in JAIL for not allowing the father to see his children. Put a little fuckin effort into it. Don't go buy a new car or rims, or Gucci bag, go pay a lawyer, most people could go to Legal Aid. Parenting is not easy, nor is maintaining a cordial relationship with an idiot...but the child deserves it. Go out and have a drink with friends and rip them a new one...just don't do it in front of the child.
nakia
· 1 year ago
"There is this precious thing called the legal system, and I know the black man is allergic to it, but it's there to prevent isht like that from happening hon. If you want to be a father but her mother says it's the baby and me or nothing, go legal on her ass. We do it to men all the time. You are going to have to be the one to break away IF thats really what you want to do. Men complain alot about this bullisht, but do absolutley nothing to try and rectify their situations."
Speak on it. That is so true. I get so tired of brothers, cousins, friends, and people on Judge Joe Brown complaining about not being part of their kids lives but then not doing anything about it. Do something...and dont wait until they're 18 to do it. If you're going to fight for anything, let it be for the right to be with your child.
I've had friends who were involved with men who couldnt see their children, and being the girlfriend, they ended up doing all of the paperwork and finding a lawyer and basically handling all their business so their man could be a daddy. I think that is dumb, ridiculous, a cowardly if a man just gives up when their BM says, "No, you can't see your child", with no legal backing.
Cheddar B
· 1 year ago
This excuse is just that..an excuse. I know mothers and father are different in the way we handle things but come on now. I know women that would go through hell and high water to be with their kids. But sadly, less than half of the fathers will do the same.
Xilla
· 1 year ago
Child Support is a State to State issue, each state has differnet rules and laws... and in nj it's the worst I will just say that... It doesn't give a damn about the father. UNless of course you pay for a lawyer and pay him 10's of thousands of dollars. So about time you get that every other weekend. you can't do nothing w/ or for your child b/c you done gave it to the middle man. and as a man who is to tell me how to raise my child?
ANuJS
· 1 year ago
Xilla from my own experiences, I think that child support is WORSE to a man who actually wants to do right by his child(ren). I knew a married man who paid child support for kids from a prev. marriage and she played GAMES. constantly hauling him in asking for an increase and taking taxes, etc. Me on the other hand look at my BD who continues to do time away at "school" (earning a PH.D...his masters wasnt good enough SMH). When he's out he just won't work-no recourse. In 16 years, we've been to court 3 times and it net me about 3 mos. of support at $100 ea. In the meantime he is living high on the hog ilegally while I struggle to do for our son. Child support makes it HARD on legit, honest men....it's just the truth. @ Cheddar, I taught in Cleveland for 3 years. If you only knew the amt. of ain't good for shit women (cracked out, out all nite, letting MEN abuse their babies) who got their kids taken away and didn't pay child support or even care that their child was alive...you'd cry. That's keepin it real. Times have changed. BTW I won't even start on the # of kids that were being sexually abused by their "step-daddies" and their mom knew all along....
Thoney Gangstasweet
· 1 year ago
hi5 stephy! i mean fa real! i live on the wesside of chicago and you just preached the hood gospel! kudos!
Ego Trippin
· 1 year ago
Man...I have to admit that when I read this I was thinking "dude is definitely trying to get his laugh on right? Because no man (in his right mind) would continue to do this shyt!" I'm not going to get down on you like some of the other responses (it's not my place to judge), but I think it's come a point where we (Black men & women) have become our worst enemy. A night nookie is not worth a lifetime of adversity & drama. If you know ol' girl is a crazy psycho bitch (and we typically see this on Day 1)...put the rubber on. If you know ol' boy is a lazy bum...put a rubber on! It's like we continue to perpetuate the stereotypes about our sexuality and is become disheartening. Why can't we get our shyt together and act like we have some sense? A desire to be something other than a B.F or B.M? If nothing else, the least we can do is get our shyt together for the kids we create.
If not it's pointless to continue an existence. Hopefully what you've gone through will give you the wisdom needed to avoid shyt like this in the future because NO PIECE of PUSSY (or dick...ladies) is worth a lifetime of grief!
As for your son....if he is truly your twin then advice him on how to avoid the pitfalls you've come across, regardless of your feelings about his mom, so he will grown into a better man & future father to his son! Good luck!
Kesha
· 1 year ago
well I am a "baby mama"...so therefore, I have a "baby daddy"...lol....but I vowed from the time I found out I was pregnant not to ever speak a negative word in the presence of "our" daughter....reason being is because my child's father is an option I chose...he is a choice I made...and it is not her fault if there are times we are unable to get along although we try our damndest to do so at all times...what we as parents have to realize is we laid down and had sex...we had choices we made and didnt make....so why dog out the other party after the fact...shit, I love being a "baby's mama"...I wouldnt change my daughter, or her father for anything in the world.!!!! Peace in the Middle East!...One Love.
LawdHaveMercy
· 1 year ago
AMEN!!! You said all there needs to be said.The key word is CHOICES.
CathrynMarie
· 1 year ago
why do u have quotes around "our" when speaking of your daughter? do you doubt your daughter is his or do you simply not know how to use quotes?
kingsmomma
· 1 year ago
I don't know why she used quotes but I used quotes when speaking to my son's father b/c I am the only providing for "our" son so as much as I know he is his son, I am the only parent. Can't speak for kesha but i know that is why i haved used the quotes in the past
Lin
· 1 year ago
I'll say this: Women who choose to bear children for no-good ass men do just that: they choose. Just like I did, but looking through rose-colored glasses at the entire man who wasn't always trifling, I'll admit that there were times when I allowed him to creep on back in. Those were the times when I wasn't in a relationship and I thought I had "needs" and I was too lazy to cultivate a relationship with someone else in order to eventually satisfy my urges. Instant gratification was what I was after. I was already familiar with his capabilities (or lack thereof, hmmmph), and so I knew what I wanted. My laziness, impatience, and comfort level contributed to my moments of weakness and we used to hit it every now and then.
Hell, we didn't always fight. He wasn't always a dumb ass who had to be told that children need to eat every damn day like his bonehead does. But I still knew that it was stupid for me to let him come back a-knockin' even a lil bit because he didn't love me, so I did what any other self-respecting woman would do when given the opportunity: I bounced. Outta town. I moved my family 540 miles away to get him outta my system (I had a myriad of other reasons to leave but this was near the top of the list), and I'm so thankful that I did. He never deserved me. And in the end, my kids were better off without the confusion of the "is he staying, why is he leaving" drama that would have ensued (they were way younger when all this stuff transpired).
P Lee
· 1 year ago
clears throat!!!!
well i see i have been getting a lot of interesting comments on my lil blog. i wish i could thank you all in person. BUT, to address some comments ; i dont think i ever mentioned my son in this blog except when i mentioned him being my twin. i you intelectuals would read what you have copied and pasted you will read not ONE mention of my baby boy. I never downed her as a mother, or as a person. clears throat!!! also i never mentioned me being afraid of the court system, i just said i didn't want to be in that motherfucker. all you softheads that would like to feed yaself ya daily bowl of bullshit wont see the reality of the situation. all of you concerned and might i add misinformed folks me and the prince appreciate all the concern. as i sit here typing away and my son on his PS2 i ask him who his best friend is, he says " John Sena" ( some wrestling mufucka). but then he turns and says "if i play the game with him, i could be his first best friend". you see i am bool with that becuz the lil homie is only 7. so to inform the people with they third eye blind pick the log outta ya eye before you tell me how to remove the splinter from mine. and last but not least in the blog i said this shit happened yearssssss ago. yall B EZ folks. i gotta let this nigga whip on my ass in this damn video game.
thejadednyer
· 1 year ago
No... after we split we had one "goodbye rendevouz" and then exited stage left for good, Despite the fact that he still wanted to.
Fact is... he was lousy in bed so it was a no brainer for me. Plus he grosses me out now so, yeah, it AIN'T gonna happen...
But I imagine for other women with fine-ass men who can put in work in the bedroom it would be easy to hate the man but love the d*ck...
Ttime
· 1 year ago
All of this drama could be avoided, not to mention lives possibly saved, by one very simple, near effortless act---PUTTING ON A DAMN CONDOM. In addition, REALLY get to know a person's CHARACTER before you have unprotected sex with him/her and bring a child into this effed up situation.
I get so sick of so-called adults always complaining about how their bd/bm have wronged, them when it was THEIR decision to F that person, unprotected, in the first place. Although I don't have any children yet, Michael Baesden said something that shook me to my core when I heard it and I think it is worth repeating ......"If you are a woman and you have a child with a man that you would NOT TRUST to raise that child in the event of your untimely death, then guess what, you PLAYED yourself BIG TIME....no excuses, you played yourself and your child, period. If you found out that you had a terminal illness today, and your BD is still alive, you should not have to worry about if your mother/sister/cousin/best friend can raise your child, because that is the role of the FATHER."
I know that this blog is all about sex, but their are consequences to sex and sex involves GREAT responsibilty....so ACT responsibly, if not for yourself, then for the future unborn children that could be the result of your actions. We, as a culture and a community, have got to do better. Until we REALLY recognize that the breakdown of the black family is the cause of most, not all, of the major problems in our communities, then we will not understand and respond accordingly to the urgency of being responsible sexually.
ZeeABad1
· 1 year ago
Geesh! Its a whole latta BM's here with built up fustration...
Glad I aint got yall problems! (Ta Ta for now)
VIChick
· 1 year ago
I have no kids and have difficulty dating men with kids...for the simple fact that I always assume they are still fucking their baby momma. Which I came to find out in almost every situation was true. Alot of women mainly my friends call me and say that "my baby daddy aint shit and he doesn't take care of his responsibilities." He wasn't shit before you got pregnant and all of a sudden he is suppose to turn in to Cliff Huxtable? HELL NO!!! Women use their pussy as a way to get that no good nigga back in the house, thinking if he comes and see the child he will see her too and have second thoughts about their relationship. And if he got that pussy again he would remember how good it feels. BULLSHIT!!!! And even though men say that if i continue fucking her she will keep out of child support, majority of women I know seem fine with that. It is so sad because the innocent child is in the middle of two bullshit people.
ANuJS
· 1 year ago
Exactly. I know a lot of women that not only keep messing with a BD but continue to birth his children. A lot of women feel sorry for these men and will stay out of child support. To me thats f'ed up. How can you care more about him not feeling the pinch of child support than you do with your child going without. I can't get with this. What really trips me out is the woman that will watch a man dog both his child's mother and that child, then they have a baby with them and think they'll do you and yours right. Out of all this nonsense, I think that most women's self esteem is in the gutter and they accept so much less then they deserve. It's a man out there that can love you right in a drama free way....if not be single and peaceful. Concentrate on raising your child b/c most times all this drama leaves them feeling worthless too. Bad enuf that their daddy don't care, but now their momma to wrapped up to care.
CathrynMarie
· 1 year ago
Ya may be thinking too much into it, too be honest. First off, that whole BM & BD term is PLAYED! My sons Father has never called me anything but his sons Mother - never his BM! We haven't had sex since we broke up in 2001. When I say you're reading more into it, think back to your exes - how many of them have you carried on with sexually after breaking up? What makes that situation any different than sex with your "BM"? Chances are, if the BM & BD didnt have a kid, they would probably still be getting down after they broke up - its called the sex with my ex is good. Or just possibly being comfortable with that certain person and not wanting to strap up or start over and find new booty.
kyas_mami
· 1 year ago
The hell if I kno! I havnt f*cked wit my daughters sperm donor since I was 3 mos prego...and I never looked back I never understood this logic... SMH
ANuJS
· 1 year ago
I had my 1st child at the ripe old age of 16. I was an honor student and on the high track to "being something"-this didn't change. I messed up and got caught up in a light skinned green eyed n**** who wasn't shit, his daddy wasn't shit, his mommy wasn't shit, etc and treated me like shit. He thought that he could plug any hole that he ran across and still come plug mine. NO SIR! I cut his ass off... before I even had the baby. I deserved more than that b.s. I was in. After the baby (BTW I gave birth on Thurs. another chick gave birth that Sunday) I went to child support and played no games. Since then he has like 6 kids (lost count) and he only takes care of the ones whose mommas he can blast thru. However, he has NEVER taken care of my son (in the 16yrs. he has paid about $300) and I have never laid back down with him. I love me too much and I love my son too much to honor a n**** who can't EVEN call on b-days let alone pay child support. That's the key love urself and that baby enuf to keep out that mess. I don't believe in moving backwards. Fucking with a dude that fucked me over would most DEF be a move in the wrong direction. I don't care how good the dick was....I'd buy a bullet.
VIChick
· 1 year ago
Steph I agree with your approach. Women just let these men do whatever the hell he wants to them and loose focus on what is most important. I have a friend that has 3 kids for a man that she actually stole from a girlfriend of hers. He had about 3 kids at this time and she went on and married him. I guess she thought since she had the ring and the last name he would do right by her. Now they are divorced and she has three kids. He pays her nothing and he doesn't even spend time with his kids and he lives like 10 minutes from her apartment. She calls me all the time stressed out and cussing because he isn't doing right by the kids. He was that way from before but she just felt but she didnt want to see that.
I WILL CONTINUE TO SAY THIS...I KNOW THE DICK CAN BE THE SHIT SOMETIMES BUT DO NOT DISREPECT URSELF FOR A NO GOOD NIGGA. I MIGHT NEED TO GET INTO THE TOY SELLING BUSINESS CAUSE YOU CAN NEVER GO WRONG WITH A FAST ASS BULLET. ESPECIALLY THE TWO HEADED ONES.
ANuJS
· 1 year ago
LMAO @ u and ur bullet. No STD's or babies...right? :)
VIChick
· 1 year ago
Girl until the good lord blesses me with the man I am suppose to spend my life with, I am married and in a very exclusive relationship my Jamal (my bullet has a first name...its J-A-M-A-L. LOL
ANuJS
· 1 year ago
LMAO. I'm not mad!
kingsmomma
· 1 year ago
I think it is quite foolish for people in the predictament to continue to procreate, however, I do understand why they would get back together. From a female perspective (i am in no way saying this is my situation so please no name calling, this is just a theory) I think women are just hurt and they say hate where they mean love. For whatever reason, they are estranged from their "boyfriend" bd and they really don't want to be so they take the occasional dalliances as a something more than what they actually are: Bootycalls. I don't condone downing the mother or father in the presence of the children or arguing in front of the child. and let's face it as Biggie said Some say the X make the sex spectacular (although i think B.I.G meant ectasy, I always took it to mean the EX) You have been with this person for a while, they know you, you know them. the sex just works.
Ess
· 1 year ago
I seriously tried to read this blog.. but after this..
Let’s start off from the top that I have a B.M. now me and her haven’t had sex in a number of years. But we haven’t been together as a couple for longer then that. Up until I meet my last girl we still kicked it from time to time, even though the b*tch hated my guts
I dont have much to say..
Interesting topic though.
This is why I just stay my childless ass in the corner.. and chill..
Carmen Sandiego
· 1 year ago
Dido
Shannon
· 1 year ago
The truth of the matter of all this baby momma drama, is HOPE, hope will drive a woman crazy everytime! I hope he gets his shit together, i hope he sees that i am the best woman for him and no one will ever love him like i do, I hope hes sees that i have had, and am taking care of his child(ern) and i hope that will make him realize that he really does love me, I hope that i give him the booty one more time and that it will be so good that he will get lost in this place between lust and love that he cant tell the difference. He dont love that new bitch he messing with....does he, i hope not! I hope that if i take him to court it will bring to such a low point in his life that he will realize just how much he needs us(me)! I hope that when he told me he loved me those times when we were having sex he really meant it, I hope that if i keep myself available he'll be able to reach for me when hes ready, I hope he will grow up and be a father to his child and a husband, hell a least a boyfriend to the woman who has always been there for him when he was low. I hope i dont have to spend the rest of my life alone, I hope my new boyfriend( that i dont really love by the way, and am only with because the love of my life the father of my child wont have me, and am just using to make my baby daddy jealous) is not touching my daughter or son( down low niggas are still out there sistas!), alot of women cant help it, we are emotional creatures and we were created that way, I believe this is one of the reasons why we end up, with un wed mothers and fathers and why they so often end up back in are bed rooms, sex is a way to escape, what better way to lie, to yourself, the one you love,and the one that is not sure, or just doesn't love you!
MsRae @twitter
· 1 year ago
I think that shit is so untrue. I feel that happen only in some cases. i will give you an example my son is about to turn 6 next months. I and his father was on and off 7 years before I had him. Two months ago we had sex with was the biggest mistake I could of make. It was so trebbile and I see why I don't fuck with him any more. I think people who do that all the time really want that person and just don;t know how to say it and use the other excuse you used in the story. Ladies leave them alone you did it for a reason before.
HappyToBeNappy
· 1 year ago
Sorry Xilla, I got no answers for you. I stopped letting my Baby Daddy beat it up the day I kicked his good for nothing ass out of my house. I like to more forward, not backwards!!! Even though the D was good, (which is the only reason I stayed as long as I did), it wasn't good enough to make me deal with him any longer. When I'm done, I'm done!!!!
HappyToBeNappy
· 1 year ago
just noticed this wasn't written by Xilla. . .my bad P. Lee, my comment should be addressed to you
Kimber
· 1 year ago
First, I love your site it's way better than most so keep that shit up!! Second., I too have ill feelings toward my baby daddy and his ass wish he could still have access to this pussy. I let that hate shit go a while ago because that just gave him more power than he even deserved. Our daughter is 16 and that's how long it's been since he hit dat, but to hear him tell it he still has action.
Depending on the lengh of the relationship, history will often times make that accomadation possible for replay sex especially if it was good. In my case this dude did me toooooooooooooooo durty to eva neva give his bitch ass some cooch. I dont care how good it was and it was one of the best but the person attached to the dick wasnt worth it.
The ego in general belonging to either parent at times can be so out of touch with reality that the priority (the kid) is just used as a tool of attack for the other parent when you dont play by the other's rules. That's why I'm glad i stuck to my guns, fuck it i'm still gonna be a bitch right? Only I'll be that bitch you REALLY wanna fuck and cant. I like that much better:)
StraightShitNoChaser
· 1 year ago
This has go to be the most ignorant thing I have ever read. I realize that you were joking about the Ike Turner reference, but it's not funny at all to make light of hitting a woman like Ike Turner. It didn't sound like a joke either but whatever. There is too much violence suffered by black women at the hands of black men right now for that kind of "humor." You sound ghetto and ignorant as hell. Your son doesn't even idolize you. He idolizes John Cena??? That's not something to be proud of. You wrote a poorly written piece with all of your business out there, yet still you come off insulting to the women who responded. I wouldn't be so full of myself if I were you.
And this is coming from someone who is not a baby mama. I pray that you get some common sense and a sense of respect. I hope you get some training and I hope that you show yourself to be a better man than your post conveys.
Im Grown
· 1 year ago
First off how old are you and your B.M? my opinion is that women only sleep with men more than once because they have some feelings deep inside for him, however, she is craz because you sound lik a guy that is first off young and inmature. Any real man does not put their hands on a woman. you should have enough respect for her as your sons mother not to hit on her. and further more how triphalin are you to say that the only reason you still sleep with her is because you don't want to be taken to court for child support. if you do what you need to do for your kid she should not take it to that level. Young man I dont know how old you are but you need to grow up!, because, i would hate to have your son date any young lady out here if he is anything like you. you ought to be ashamed of yourself and if i was your childs mother. I would have someone knock your dick in the dirt hust for putting this on here.
what you need to do is grow up and try to be a role model for your son! cause you think you doing somthing by as you call it " beatin dat Azz up" Well let me put you up on somthing cuzzo,! it's another man out here that will respect her and treat her like the lady she is and take care of your son and beat it up like you could only imagine...lol and you would not have a chance in he!! believe that...!!!!
me
· 1 year ago
Only woman i feel do that are woman who have low self esteem and they can not find that good DICK or they were trying to trapp you and nowwww they hate you because it did not work. But I am a BM and that is why they say wait until you get married to have children because naturally whoever you have a chikld with you feel connected to even in sex with out a baby you leave a part of yourself with tjat person but alot of times you can shake that off because you dont have a constant reminder that you have giving yourself to someone for theest of your life
All Comments
on one recent RARE occassion this male. we'll call him Blucralpha stepped to me. He had it goin on,intelligent, great dresser,taller than me, kinda chubby, great job in an office building near mines, nice car, went to church sorta often and loved him some Hani. he couldn't make me cum by fucking, but his head was something like oscarworthy dramatic and he spoke the entire time. HEY THERE NOW! tell her how good it is...meeemories...ANYwho. our freakometers were eerily in tune! in the bathroom at the taste with the frozen chocolate bananas? ok i have on a sundress and thigh-highs. its NOTHING! i'll have Rob buzz you up for the apetizer....moving along, Blucralpha and I dated for a hot minute. Never did I know of the tomfuggery that would beseech my sweet soul...BLAM! his babymama leaps out the Pjs like a rat round ol' jewtown.Did Blublu reallyhave a 10month old son by a hoodrat that decided to stalk me? nah. this will all go away after i finish this bottle of Soracco[fellas cop that wine] so I meet the trollop on the wesside, on my turf in case i gotta phone the goons to get her right. [Don't get it twisted, i've been known to beat the breaks off hoes while donning brooks brothers and prada. ASK about the kid....side bar ,the CPD should utilize babymama's supersleuthin skills and find Alexi's ass cuz blublu's trollp shole NUFF found me! i STAY lowkey wtfugg? AAAANYwho] after speaking with her and being urged to just stay away from her babydaddy, I was left dumbfounded and completely confused. I cried for days. Not because I thought Blucralpha was my futurebabydaddy, but more for the sorry state we're in as young blacks trying to love/date. How did he find her block to hump her? Judging by her appearance she definitely was a potential slamonella or hiv carrier, so why would he go raw?he went in it for some quick easy lowkey no work booty and is now saddled down with a40-life sentence. [when u have a kid ur attached to that person for ur entire life span. i figure u live to about 80 so u and the trollop gone have ta at least be social for 40 or so years past the humpin pt] Have we lost out minds?!!? ARG!?! needless to say, I never spoke to him again and to this day he shoots me the side eye or tries to randomly call. I love me so damn much I'm not interested in any explanation. thas why i'm unhappily single i guess. i don't do conflict well at all. i'm evil and cut people off quicka thanna skrippa lose clothes... i hope you went to blogxilla's site. he has some REALLY dope posts on there. REALLY! everything i'm reading is making me rethink my whole situation...mmhmm! sho nuff!
i, and many like melooking for what u mentioned above but he is settling for whoever sparkles the most or is easy. i know 3 brothas right now, probably paying for everything their chick wants only to not get a thank u/be fighting tonite. all this because she's light/gotta phatass. mmm? yes! my guy told me "my girl nuttier thant sherise[this crazy chick from hf] but i mean i like when niggas look at me like i gotta bad one. its not that u like ain worf dating,u ain ugly and u cool as hell, but a nigga see you and think that's somebody's mama material, and u prolly gotta man.i wanted to snap my phone in half but i totally got what he was sayin. it was real. i have a huge heart and am more maternal and love to look out for those i love, so that makes me undatable to black men in chicago? wowzers! it irks me to my core how men have soooo many options and i'm stuck internet dating and or dealing with somebody's husband. i'm worth more than that. and have more respect for somebody else's union than that. i mean a brotha can have the white freak,the asian assistant to do the work, the indian to run the money, the latina for hot sex,all while bn married to a sista. FUCK THAT!
anywho my adventure with Blucalpha the babydaddy broke my heart. not because i loved him but because i felt so damn powerless. i've even been trapped by a guy in the[the damn STEELerho wasn't even working with a sphaghettithumb. at 320lbs i shouldn't need my contract readers on to see it] and i will openly admit i headed str8 to the chop shot to handle my bi. bc failed me....i REFUSE to have a baby by someone i don't care for! and i would have been set for life! mmmm these haffas and trollops out here popping babies out like the rats they are and struggling and fuckin for free. i don't understand it. i'm gonna keep my tight p-u nice and spawn free. even if i do have a baby i'm getting a c-sections and tummytuck cuz my goodies need to stay right! yaDIIIIIIG!? its time for this bs to END! NOW! i ain' playin! i swear i'm not! while these losers are humping the bowl movements l mean baby mamas[i got confused] they are passing up winners like myself! WEAR A DAMN CONDOM or pull out! seriously!
If the man knows the woman is crazy why can't he take the 10 seconds to tear open the condom and put it on. If the woman knows that the man already has three kids that he doesn't take care of, why not take the time everyday to swallow a pill. All of this nonsense does not have to happen.
Hell i had to keep fukin my B.M so she wouldn't take a nigga to court to try to take some of my illegally obtained gwap. i felt like a whore - Seems to me you are the cause of the chaos. Let her take you to court and let her have your money if it will give you peace of mind. Fucking to get out of child support? Really?
anyway we would do the nasty from time to time in-between the temporary restraining orders, and court dates, niggas lookin for me cuz i done slapped soul sista with a back hand reminiscing of the good ol' IKE TURNER. - This is why I feel sorry for your son.
Women aren't with their baby daddy's because they lay down with any old piece of dick and end up pregnant...and then look stupid when he doesn't pay child support....
What really pisses me off about this tragedy of a blog is that the kids are the ones that suffer the most and then we have little boys who are like their trifling daddy's, little girls that turn out like their mothers. Neither have any respect for life or themselves.
Your answer is simple. It is pure ignorance and selfishness.
I mean I could say I don't give a shit about what happens in other peoples homes, but I do, because it affects me and my family. Men don't deserve extra points for being a good father, and women don't deserve extra points for being a good mother. You should do things that will help your child have a nice childhood, and be a responsible adult. It is our responsibility as parents.
In general though, I think a lot of women have sex with their kids' father(s)despite the lack of a "real relationship" just because it's safe and comfortable. Better to stick to the devil you know, rather than the one you don't. Especially when you have kids in your home.
SHOT OUT TO ALI YA DIG. I MISS MY HOMIE.
Hell i had to keep fukin my B.M so she wouldn't take a nigga to court to try to take some of my illegally obtained gwap.
I hate it when men say that! No you didnt, you chose to. There is this precious thing called the legal system, and I know the black man is allergic to it, but it's there to prevent isht like that from happening hon. If you want to be a father but her mother says it's the baby and me or nothing, go legal on her ass. We do it to men all the time. You are going to have to be the one to break away IF thats really what you want to do. Men complain alot about this bullisht, but do absolutley nothing to try and rectify their situations. Hell, it almost seems as though men like the drama more than women do.
Women play the that hate card because they hate the fact that they can't have them without all the strings. They know that you wouldnt be making those late runs to her house if the baby was not there. they know you're just there for the kid and their cooch is a bonus.
I am so glad that I am free of BMS. It's too much hassel and stress personally. I could care less what my childs father does or who he does it with, as long as my daughter and I are treated with respect, we're A-ok.
Amen! Especially since they will put the woman in JAIL for not allowing the father to see his children. Put a little fuckin effort into it. Don't go buy a new car or rims, or Gucci bag, go pay a lawyer, most people could go to Legal Aid. Parenting is not easy, nor is maintaining a cordial relationship with an idiot...but the child deserves it. Go out and have a drink with friends and rip them a new one...just don't do it in front of the child.
Speak on it. That is so true. I get so tired of brothers, cousins, friends, and people on Judge Joe Brown complaining about not being part of their kids lives but then not doing anything about it. Do something...and dont wait until they're 18 to do it. If you're going to fight for anything, let it be for the right to be with your child.
I've had friends who were involved with men who couldnt see their children, and being the girlfriend, they ended up doing all of the paperwork and finding a lawyer and basically handling all their business so their man could be a daddy. I think that is dumb, ridiculous, a cowardly if a man just gives up when their BM says, "No, you can't see your child", with no legal backing.
If not it's pointless to continue an existence. Hopefully what you've gone through will give you the wisdom needed to avoid shyt like this in the future because NO PIECE of PUSSY (or dick...ladies) is worth a lifetime of grief!
As for your son....if he is truly your twin then advice him on how to avoid the pitfalls you've come across, regardless of your feelings about his mom, so he will grown into a better man & future father to his son! Good luck!
Hell, we didn't always fight. He wasn't always a dumb ass who had to be told that children need to eat every damn day like his bonehead does. But I still knew that it was stupid for me to let him come back a-knockin' even a lil bit because he didn't love me, so I did what any other self-respecting woman would do when given the opportunity: I bounced. Outta town. I moved my family 540 miles away to get him outta my system (I had a myriad of other reasons to leave but this was near the top of the list), and I'm so thankful that I did. He never deserved me. And in the end, my kids were better off without the confusion of the "is he staying, why is he leaving" drama that would have ensued (they were way younger when all this stuff transpired).
well i see i have been getting a lot of interesting comments on my lil blog. i wish i could thank you all in person. BUT, to address some comments ; i dont think i ever mentioned my son in this blog except when i mentioned him being my twin. i you intelectuals would read what you have copied and pasted you will read not ONE mention of my baby boy. I never downed her as a mother, or as a person. clears throat!!! also i never mentioned me being afraid of the court system, i just said i didn't want to be in that motherfucker. all you softheads that would like to feed yaself ya daily bowl of bullshit wont see the reality of the situation. all of you concerned and might i add misinformed folks me and the prince appreciate all the concern. as i sit here typing away and my son on his PS2 i ask him who his best friend is, he says " John Sena" ( some wrestling mufucka). but then he turns and says "if i play the game with him, i could be his first best friend". you see i am bool with that becuz the lil
homie is only 7. so to inform the people with they third eye blind pick the log outta ya eye before you tell me how to remove the splinter from mine. and last but not least in the blog i said this shit happened yearssssss ago. yall B EZ folks. i gotta let this nigga whip on my ass in this damn video game.
Fact is... he was lousy in bed so it was a no brainer for me. Plus he grosses me out now so, yeah, it AIN'T gonna happen...
But I imagine for other women with fine-ass men who can put in work in the bedroom it would be easy to hate the man but love the d*ck...
I get so sick of so-called adults always complaining about how their bd/bm have wronged, them when it was THEIR decision to F that person, unprotected, in the first place. Although I don't have any children yet, Michael Baesden said something that shook me to my core when I heard it and I think it is worth repeating ......"If you are a woman and you have a child with a man that you would NOT TRUST to raise that child in the event of your untimely death, then guess what, you PLAYED yourself BIG TIME....no excuses, you played yourself and your child, period. If you found out that you had a terminal illness today, and your BD is still alive, you should not have to worry about if your mother/sister/cousin/best friend can raise your child, because that is the role of the FATHER."
I know that this blog is all about sex, but their are consequences to sex and sex involves GREAT responsibilty....so ACT responsibly, if not for yourself, then for the future unborn children that could be the result of your actions. We, as a culture and a community, have got to do better. Until we REALLY recognize that the breakdown of the black family is the cause of most, not all, of the major problems in our communities, then we will not understand and respond accordingly to the urgency of being responsible sexually.
Glad I aint got yall problems! (Ta Ta for now)
I havnt f*cked wit my daughters sperm donor since I was 3 mos prego...and I never looked back
I never understood this logic... SMH
I WILL CONTINUE TO SAY THIS...I KNOW THE DICK CAN BE THE SHIT SOMETIMES BUT DO NOT DISREPECT URSELF FOR A NO GOOD NIGGA. I MIGHT NEED TO GET INTO THE TOY SELLING BUSINESS CAUSE YOU CAN NEVER GO WRONG WITH A FAST ASS BULLET. ESPECIALLY THE TWO HEADED ONES.
I think women are just hurt and they say hate where they mean love. For whatever reason, they are estranged from their "boyfriend" bd and they really don't want to be so they take the occasional dalliances as a something more than what they actually are: Bootycalls.
I don't condone downing the mother or father in the presence of the children or arguing in front of the child.
and let's face it as Biggie said Some say the X make the sex spectacular (although i think B.I.G meant ectasy, I always took it to mean the EX) You have been with this person for a while, they know you, you know them. the sex just works.
Let’s start off from the top that I have a B.M. now me and her haven’t had sex in a number of years. But we haven’t been together as a couple for longer then that. Up until I meet my last girl we still kicked it from time to time, even though the b*tch hated my guts
I dont have much to say..
Interesting topic though.
This is why I just stay my childless ass in the corner.. and chill..
Depending on the lengh of the relationship, history will often times make that accomadation possible for replay sex especially if it was good. In my case this dude did me toooooooooooooooo durty to eva neva give his bitch ass some cooch. I dont care how good it was and it was one of the best but the person attached to the dick wasnt worth it.
The ego in general belonging to either parent at times can be so out of touch with reality that the priority (the kid) is just used as a tool of attack for the other parent when you dont play by the other's rules. That's why I'm glad i stuck to my guns, fuck it i'm still gonna be a bitch right? Only I'll be that bitch you REALLY wanna fuck and cant. I like that much better:)
And this is coming from someone who is not a baby mama. I pray that you get some common sense and a sense of respect. I hope you get some training and I hope that you show yourself to be a better man than your post conveys.
what you need to do is grow up and try to be a role model for your son! cause you think you doing somthing by as you call it " beatin dat Azz up" Well let me put you up on somthing cuzzo,! it's another man out here that will respect her and treat her like the lady she is and take care of your son and beat it up like you could only imagine...lol and you would not have a chance in he!! believe that...!!!!