the mom in me wishes she knew some nice girls to set you up with. Alas, I do not.
chin up, tho, man. you'll find her. but perhaps it needs to be someone who's never read your blog? you know some people have a hard time separating the man from the image.
I get the same ish- people assume I'm a real b*tch when actually I'm only about 37.8% b*tch...
EbonyLolita
· 8 months ago
Talk less about work and more about yourself, true self not Xilla which is like your alter-ego. When your job appears to be the only thing that ignites passion in you a woman will think that all she can possibly to you is the next pending storyline. Any woman worth her weight doesn't want that and doesn't have time to roll the dice. I don't believe what I see anymore I believe what I hear and it's true perception is everything. But hey, what do I know I just leave comments on here. *shrugs* Good luck with your search *insert true name/self here* I really mean that :)
Thoney Gangstasweet
· 8 months ago
^ sums up my sentiments exactly.. go head ebony... you never mention names, but whomever you deal with will most likely have friends that frequent this site and or mention that you run this site...any deso female won't want to be blasted online, and accordingly its easier to just avoid intimate interactions.....the opposite can be assumed also. some ho's might want the fam of having possibly tamed the xilla and so they get into conquer mode..... i'm experiencing the same problem in chi.... most black guys don't do what the whiteboys do eagerly and they know that ill blog about them being whack in detail so they just look or made comments or lust after me.... find somebody unassuming and low'key. it helps if they aren't as into the internet as you are...that way they'll miss whatever story you write/be too busy with their own b-i to focus on what u might "do" to them....
30000ft
· 8 months ago
you need more people:-) (j/k)........ Seriously though, for as long as I've been lurking on this site you've never given that off the vibe that you'd rather be doing the serious thing (unless I missed it). Now that you have put that out there you may be on your way to finding something special. Good Luck!
magoo
· 8 months ago
From personal experience, once you get that player tag, whether true or false, its hard to get rid. I imagine that this may be even harder for you being that you've discussed your past "exploits" and knowledge of sex so frequently(yes its what you do) it may be taken out of context. Perception is everything...
streetz
· 8 months ago
I feel you 100% on this issue. Perception is only reality if your actions agree. I've had potential relationships go up in smoke... and paid tolls, $$ and all that for it go to waste. makes you wish bothed dates were tax deductible! lol
HeadMistress
· 8 months ago
Wow! I never heard it put like that, but I think I kinda understand....
It sounds like I feel when I buy a lottery ticket or a scratch off and don't win...ca' get my dollar back?
Lili
· 8 months ago
Too big? Hm...I want to ask what's too big...
You should have coaxed her into giving it a shot!
Most women tell you how hard it is to find a man who wants a genuine relationship...I find it hard to believe you haven't encountered a woman who wants one too.
1. You're approaching the wrong women. 2. You're giving off the wrong signals.
nspirin
· 8 months ago
xilla i feel your pain big homie it's hard finding a women out here that you can really connect with.
HeadMistress
· 8 months ago
SMH...reading comprehension is a dying skill....and the problem is most people who read your blog ONLY read the sex - they clearly don't/can't comprehend all that you really put out there
The woman for you will see beyond/comprehend more than the sex and be able to appreciate you - and you won't have to change your blog or your brand for it to happen, you just have to be patient and that sucks but it'll be worth it when it happens, don't give up hope
Reesethe
· 8 months ago
Awww poor Xilla. Maybe its the vibe your giving out. Or maybe its the type of females that are attracted to you right now. I wouldn't worry about it though. You want quality and sometimes you have to wait. Be patient.
SW1
· 8 months ago
Amen to that. You need to do more relationship stuff, that is lacking of late. It was one of the things that drew me to your site in 1st place. Even if it's to do with your present situation and your troubles finding yourself a lady.
Nothing comes before it's time. Don't rush it, when you do you get the wrong person for you. It's a lesson i have had to learn the hard way.
Ness
· 8 months ago
LMAO.......
onebaddboo
· 8 months ago
My exact reaction!!!!!!
Ness
· 8 months ago
Lol....I don't know what made me (LMAO) but sitting at my desk reading the whole story, the ending really made me LMAO literally :)
Sweet T
· 8 months ago
hmm i sat here 4 the past hour and wondered y you were laughin. The only thing i came up with is that you must have fukked xilla!!!! just because i've been mia for a while don't think i don't see what goes on around here.
so how was it? LMAO
Ness
· 8 months ago
Hey now....there are other ppl who commented that felt the same way I did lmao!!!!!
R u saying that u didn't find the ending of the post kinda funny. Not in the sense of laughing at him but laughing at what was said.....lol....
:) I'm glad I can bring u back from being "mia"...lol
Ness
· 8 months ago
Okay....I'm sorry. I didn't mean to laugh. It just sounded funny towards the end lol
If a serious relationship is what you want then u have to think, say and do relationship things. Once the universe see that you have changed your aim, then it will send you what you're looking for.
How about you introduce yourself as ur (gov't 1st name) when you meet a female u might be interested in. For me, I don't take a guy seriously if he gives me his nick name right out the gate....I know he's only in it for the short term. And if tht's not what I want then there's not need to go there.
Conitune to speak what u want into existence and it will happen :)
HeadMistress
· 8 months ago
Ok, Ness you had me dyin laughing over here for a minute... :-D
I was like "compassionate much?" LMAO!!!
Good advice tho and assuming there are his type of women out there who don't know who/what Blogxilla is, he can try to keep, not change, just keep the blog under wraps until she gets to know him...
Ness
· 8 months ago
Lol....it just sounded funny......
I didn't mean it to sound mean lol.
But yeah....all he has to do is what you said :)
Thoney Gangstasweet
· 8 months ago
i was afraid to type lmbphao because head mighta called me a childish inbred stoppidlyfroonish something but dayum if the i wish i coulda went dutch thing didn't make me chuckle....
what you said is true. when i slowed down. started doing things on a much more grownup scale things happened. i said, i want a long conversation with a man, i want to speak with congressmen and women and have my whiteboy paint my toes and read corny poetry...i litterally started asking for everything i wanted and things just started changing. while i still wish this could come at the hands of a brotha, i'm excited about the experiences and the turn that my dating life has taken....
p.s. ness u still my babymama fa the whole nickname thing. i HATE when guys go, "my name lil'durrel, gottiboy, poostank, GFo's, etc" nigga what yo mama brand u? i REFUSE to honor the wonky nicknames. its sooooo hs or something! hehehe :p
Ness
· 8 months ago
You are soooo right!!!
I'm a firm believer that when you want something you have to speak it into existence and it will happen. I've done that across the board with things in my life like a career/job, and a place to live.....
That's why ppl have to be careful what they day & what they do b/c it will happen.
I hate nick names upon first meeting someone....lol....if u have a nick name then cool, I'll find out eventually & I might start calling you by it, but until then, if your mama named you Joseph then don't introduce yourself as J-Money....lol.
Quonesha
· 8 months ago
Aww...Xilla this is a nice one. You'll find her or maybe she'll find you...all in due time
Sexy N Sassy
· 8 months ago
That's different for a change,usually its the men who just wants sex.
Blacksand
· 8 months ago
It's not really that different Ms. Sexy N Sassy. Men want Love just as much as you do we just don't verbalize it that often. This is a good blog Xilla. You should be serious like this more often man. I understand where you are coming from. It is not cool to be used for sex. I didn't like it when it was done to me therefore I don't do that to women. I was never a player. I could've been one but I wanted /want quality not quantity. I always treated the women I was with the way I would want someone to treat my sister or my mother.
In this life everything we do makes full circle. You will find her. The key is not to look for her. Take this time to improve upon yourself. Do not attempt to kick it to women. All you have to do is be yourself. Use your real name. Keep Xilla in the man box and introduce your true self to women. After the conversation is done let her know you enjoyed her company and keep it moving. Before you know it she will be right in front of you and you will be ready to receieve her.
What your last lady did was wrong man. It happened, all you can do is learn from it. Let go and let God, keep it moving. Forgive her and know that all women are not that way. You will find your rib. All good things in time my friend.
Watch your Thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your Habits, they become character. Watch your Character, for it becomes your Destiny
Patience is the key my friend. She wll be therre when you least expect her to.
Lili
· 8 months ago
Hmm...very well stated. You wouldn't happen to be in the DC area, would you? LOL j/p
Blacksand
· 8 months ago
Thank you Ms. Lili, I appreciate your input. And yes, I am in the DC area..lol! Have a good day! (SMILE)
Ness
· 8 months ago
WOW!!!!!!!!!!
I am soooooooo loving the ending:
Watch your Thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your Habits, they become character. Watch your Character, for it becomes your Destiny
These words hit home.....I copied and pasted it to my computer.
Blacksand
· 8 months ago
Good morning beautiful, I am glad you enjoyed the words of wisdom. The truth is the truth. Have a good day!!
Tranquila (take it easy)
Thoney Gangstasweet
· 8 months ago
my number is 708-253-XXXX and i'ma virgo! i stay wesside o' da go!
Kiwi
· 8 months ago
LMAO at your last comment. Well I know its hard Xilla but yeah if they chicks you are dating know about your blog...they are automatically going to assume things about you...sexually.
Maybe you need to mix your blog more with relationship advice now so chicks wont think your mind is one-track. But the right one will come and appreciate you one day. Xilla are you sure you are approaching and associating yourself with the right females? Lets be real...if you messing with RATS and trash then you have to expect that.
Trust and believe there are so many "single" women...of good quality for you to choose from ( that 10:1 ratio) so the odds are in your favor. Just be geniune with what you do. And try this: Next time you date a girl you are really feeling, even if she knows about your blog, try your damnest not to have sex with her or hit on her sexually...but make it a mental and emotional connection so that she will know that you are more than Xilla the sexual deviant! LOL
Good Luck
-Kiwi
taut_7
· 8 months ago
dude you are hilarious.
chanel
· 8 months ago
you must be a very confident sexual being and give off a sex vibe. even though i'm sure you don't only talk about sex with women, if things feel very sexual up front we usually think you dont want anything more than sex. And instead of getting it in with a jerk, you might as well get down with someone thats nice. You are probally very attentive and charming also, those traits are basically like pre-foreplay for us. hey i'm single ... you live near boston?... lol i kid i kid... not really ....
MsLady..
· 8 months ago
There is Something so Incredibly Sexy about this Declaration Xilla. You can't deny the Fact that U get women off with the descriptive words used in these blogs. You Give such a Visual experience... Its so Good in Most cases that it leaves a Girl wondering...Me Wondering. In fact its Not the Player Piece I would be worried about..It would more so Be...Will I be able to Satisfy this Dude-Since he's so Dope and Experienced?? Face it the ManXilla is Intimidating! How would you feel if Roles were reversed...? Would you understand or would this perception follow???
Thoney Gangstasweet
· 8 months ago
AND ANOTHA THANG, i sent you the recipe u asked for, i'm a master at having RELATIONSHIPS , start posting about that more...... ideas: how to keep an inviting home[tips on where to find candles/how to cleanetc], recipes, massage techniques, low-budget lovin, mind sex, great dates, these are corny wacky examples, but i agree with somebody that said they came here for the relationship AND sex advice... maybe you could start a dating service on here? hook up people that want to DATE and not just hump.... ur quite the intelligent one. you'll figure it out.....
All Comments
chin up, tho, man. you'll find her. but perhaps it needs to be someone who's never read your blog? you know some people have a hard time separating the man from the image.
I get the same ish- people assume I'm a real b*tch when actually I'm only about 37.8% b*tch...
It sounds like I feel when I buy a lottery ticket or a scratch off and don't win...ca' get my dollar back?
Hm...I want to ask what's too big...
You should have coaxed her into giving it a shot!
Most women tell you how hard it is to find a man who wants a genuine relationship...I find it hard to believe you haven't encountered a woman who wants one too.
1. You're approaching the wrong women.
2. You're giving off the wrong signals.
it's hard finding a women out here that you can really connect with.
The woman for you will see beyond/comprehend more than the sex and be able to appreciate you - and you won't have to change your blog or your brand for it to happen, you just have to be patient and that sucks but it'll be worth it when it happens, don't give up hope
Nothing comes before it's time. Don't rush it, when you do you get the wrong person for you. It's a lesson i have had to learn the hard way.
so how was it? LMAO
R u saying that u didn't find the ending of the post kinda funny. Not in the sense of laughing at him but laughing at what was said.....lol....
:) I'm glad I can bring u back from being "mia"...lol
If a serious relationship is what you want then u have to think, say and do relationship things. Once the universe see that you have changed your aim, then it will send you what you're looking for.
How about you introduce yourself as ur (gov't 1st name) when you meet a female u might be interested in. For me, I don't take a guy seriously if he gives me his nick name right out the gate....I know he's only in it for the short term. And if tht's not what I want then there's not need to go there.
Conitune to speak what u want into existence and it will happen :)
I was like "compassionate much?" LMAO!!!
Good advice tho and assuming there are his type of women out there who don't know who/what Blogxilla is, he can try to keep, not change, just keep the blog under wraps until she gets to know him...
I didn't mean it to sound mean lol.
But yeah....all he has to do is what you said :)
what you said is true. when i slowed down. started doing things on a much more grownup scale things happened. i said, i want a long conversation with a man, i want to speak with congressmen and women and have my whiteboy paint my toes and read corny poetry...i litterally started asking for everything i wanted and things just started changing. while i still wish this could come at the hands of a brotha, i'm excited about the experiences and the turn that my dating life has taken....
p.s. ness u still my babymama fa the whole nickname thing. i HATE when guys go, "my name lil'durrel, gottiboy, poostank, GFo's, etc" nigga what yo mama brand u? i REFUSE to honor the wonky nicknames. its sooooo hs or something! hehehe :p
I'm a firm believer that when you want something you have to speak it into existence and it will happen. I've done that across the board with things in my life like a career/job, and a place to live.....
That's why ppl have to be careful what they day & what they do b/c it will happen.
I hate nick names upon first meeting someone....lol....if u have a nick name then cool, I'll find out eventually & I might start calling you by it, but until then, if your mama named you Joseph then don't introduce yourself as J-Money....lol.
In this life everything we do makes full circle. You will find her. The key is not to look for her. Take this time to improve upon yourself. Do not attempt to kick it to women. All you have to do is be yourself. Use your real name. Keep Xilla in the man box and introduce your true self to women. After the conversation is done let her know you enjoyed her company and keep it moving. Before you know it she will be right in front of you and you will be ready to receieve her.
What your last lady did was wrong man. It happened, all you can do is learn from it. Let go and let God, keep it moving. Forgive her and know that all women are not that way. You will find your rib. All good things in time my friend.
Watch your Thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your Habits, they become character.
Watch your Character, for it becomes your Destiny
Patience is the key my friend. She wll be therre when you least expect her to.
I am soooooooo loving the ending:
Watch your Thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your Habits, they become character.
Watch your Character, for it becomes your Destiny
These words hit home.....I copied and pasted it to my computer.
Tranquila (take it easy)
Maybe you need to mix your blog more with relationship advice now so chicks wont think your mind is one-track. But the right one will come and appreciate you one day. Xilla are you sure you are approaching and associating yourself with the right females? Lets be real...if you messing with RATS and trash then you have to expect that.
Trust and believe there are so many "single" women...of good quality for you to choose from ( that 10:1 ratio) so the odds are in your favor. Just be geniune with what you do. And try this: Next time you date a girl you are really feeling, even if she knows about your blog, try your damnest not to have sex with her or hit on her sexually...but make it a mental and emotional connection so that she will know that you are more than Xilla the sexual deviant! LOL
Good Luck
-Kiwi